Post by Darth Mantis on Jul 11, 2006 17:08:58 GMT -5
ok this is my first fanfic that i have ever done in my life so tell me what you honestly think...and i only have about 2 chapters done so far so...ya tell me what you think
THE LONE SAMURAI
Joseph knew that he was in trouble when he found out what time it was. He started running for home, sweaty in his black clothes and his wooden sword on his belt. He knew that his mother would be quite forgiving, but his father was another story. As he appeared at the gates of the city, he knew something was wrong. All the lights in the city were turned off, though it was too early for anyone to be in bed. He continued to walk to his home, seeing no one in the streets, but as he turned the corner to head home, he could see many bodies, some stacked up on top of the others, all bloody. He stared in horror for a few moments then remembered his parents. He started springing down the street seeing more and more bodies as he went. Finally when he made it to his home, taking off his shoes to be sure not to track dirt, he immediately started looking for his parents. “Mother? Father?” he called out but got no answer. He went through each room in the house looking and calling for them without response. Then he got to his brothers room. Slowly going toward the door, he suddenly heard the slash sound of a sword and a scream of horror. He slowly grabbed for the door when he again heard the sound of the sword and another scream. He quickly grabbed the door and burst into the room. Suddenly he saw his two parents, bloody all over, lying on the ground. “Mother, Father?” he asked, hoping through his tears that they would answer him, but he got none. Then he saw him, a man with his sword in his hand, ready to strike. To afraid to do anything, Joseph ran out of the room and house. Running down the street, he did anything to get away. He would do anything to stay alive. Suddenly a rock caught his foot and he fell to the ground. As he looked up, the man who he had seen was standing right in front of him, sword ready. He then noticed his face and stared thinking that there was no way it could be true. He was looking into the eyes of his older brother, whom he had respected all his life. “Why?” he asked through streams of tears in his eyes, “Why would you do that?”
His brother only looked coolly at him and said calmly, “I wanted to see how strong I truly was.”
Through tears, which were running down his face, he screamed, “You couldn’t do that by training? You had to kill your own parents, my parents?”
He just looked at his brother with his sword out. In his anger, Joseph started running at his brother, intending to kill him by any means necessary. All that came out of that was a punch to the gut, and the incredible pain that followed. As he writhed on the ground, he cried to himself and begged, “Please don’t kill me.”
His brother merely laughed and said, “Foolish little brother, you are too weak to kill.” With that he walked away, never to be seen or heard from again. Joseph vowed that if he ever saw his brother again, he would kill him.
THE LONE SAMURAI
intro
Joseph knew that he was in trouble when he found out what time it was. He started running for home, sweaty in his black clothes and his wooden sword on his belt. He knew that his mother would be quite forgiving, but his father was another story. As he appeared at the gates of the city, he knew something was wrong. All the lights in the city were turned off, though it was too early for anyone to be in bed. He continued to walk to his home, seeing no one in the streets, but as he turned the corner to head home, he could see many bodies, some stacked up on top of the others, all bloody. He stared in horror for a few moments then remembered his parents. He started springing down the street seeing more and more bodies as he went. Finally when he made it to his home, taking off his shoes to be sure not to track dirt, he immediately started looking for his parents. “Mother? Father?” he called out but got no answer. He went through each room in the house looking and calling for them without response. Then he got to his brothers room. Slowly going toward the door, he suddenly heard the slash sound of a sword and a scream of horror. He slowly grabbed for the door when he again heard the sound of the sword and another scream. He quickly grabbed the door and burst into the room. Suddenly he saw his two parents, bloody all over, lying on the ground. “Mother, Father?” he asked, hoping through his tears that they would answer him, but he got none. Then he saw him, a man with his sword in his hand, ready to strike. To afraid to do anything, Joseph ran out of the room and house. Running down the street, he did anything to get away. He would do anything to stay alive. Suddenly a rock caught his foot and he fell to the ground. As he looked up, the man who he had seen was standing right in front of him, sword ready. He then noticed his face and stared thinking that there was no way it could be true. He was looking into the eyes of his older brother, whom he had respected all his life. “Why?” he asked through streams of tears in his eyes, “Why would you do that?”
His brother only looked coolly at him and said calmly, “I wanted to see how strong I truly was.”
Through tears, which were running down his face, he screamed, “You couldn’t do that by training? You had to kill your own parents, my parents?”
He just looked at his brother with his sword out. In his anger, Joseph started running at his brother, intending to kill him by any means necessary. All that came out of that was a punch to the gut, and the incredible pain that followed. As he writhed on the ground, he cried to himself and begged, “Please don’t kill me.”
His brother merely laughed and said, “Foolish little brother, you are too weak to kill.” With that he walked away, never to be seen or heard from again. Joseph vowed that if he ever saw his brother again, he would kill him.